Friday, September 16, 2011


"I've got the moves like Jagger
I've got the moves like jagger

I don't need to try to control you
Look into my eyes and I'll own you

With the moves like Jagger"

Phew! i thought this week was never gonna end.

It was a busy and exhausting one. I am looking forward to staying in bed all weekend reading fictional books and getting lost in good music....

Here is a song i am very excited about at the moment. Love the energy and gosh Christina's voice is so beautiful.

"You want to know how to make me smile
Take control, own me just for the night
But if I share my secret
You're gonna have to keep it
Nobody else can see this

So watch and learn
I won't show you twice
Head to toe, oh baby, rub me right
But if I share my secret
You're gonna have to keep it
Nobody else can see this"

Enjoy Moves like Jagger by Maroon 5 ft Christina Aguilera

Have a great weekend and be happy :)

Monday, September 12, 2011

Don't make me....

Three days ago, a friend randomly asked me in between our back and forth business emails. "Why are you not in a relationship and don't tell me you are married to work and business?"

I am taking the year off dating.

No people don't take time off dating, he's can't be entirely single.

He's a guy. Men are never 100% single, they may not be in a relationship, but it's rare to find a very single guy. I had this conversation with my girlfriends while on vacation. It was Chioma's birthday. We went for an Italian early dinner, got drunk on red wine, moved to happy hour for 2 for 1 cocktails and went to see Lion King. We were kinda drunk, laughed through out the musical but had awesome conversations. Consensus was it was impossible for a man to be single. There's always one girl, maybe two or three somewhere with a situationship. I believe. Do you?

No wonder he doesn't believe women can be single.

I have met guys who want more. they want more attention, more hanging outs. I can't. They always want more. I don't have more to give. I tell them, i can't. They think i'm weird. Everywoman wants to date. No. Not me.

Hurt me a little to tell a decent dude to move past me. He should not fall in love with me. Reminds me of Birds pt 1. A track by The Weeknd.

So don’t you fall in love
Don’t make me make you fall in love
Don’t make me make you fall in love with a woman like me
Like me
Cuz boy I’m just a bird
I’m just another bird
Don’t make me make you fall in love with a woman like me
Like me

I am not ready to date. I don't want a man right now. I am enjoying being single. I don't lack male attention or conversation but that's where it ends. Nothing intimate. Nothing. The year off has put a lot of things in perspective. Sad i have a few months left. I should enjoy it to the fullest. I am enjoying it.

Thursday, September 8, 2011


I had a stressful day yesterday. I just wanted to crawl in bed and cry. I found it hard to say Thank you God for today but then i remembered that we have to always give thanks so i tweeted instead "In all things....Give thanks"

Someone retweeted and added: "Always. Even in the hardest of times. May God help us all to learn to do this."

He was right. He is still right. Sometimes we get so weighed down that we forget to appreciate the little things and show gratitude. It is good to give thanks.

I am thankful for

1. The gift of life for me, my family, friends and you my darling readers.

2. The phone company here that restored my blackberry service. I was off BBM for a week and it affected a few things. Thankful for BBM, well till Apple comes out with something similar :)

3. Friendship: My good friends who know my strengths and accept my weaknesses, who don't judge and are quick to support and help me in my decisions and life. The ones who don't laugh at the stupid things i say sometimes.

4. The wonderful people I have been privileged to meet via social networks. A really nice fellow on twitter helped me with the financial modelling of my business. I was going to pay over a thousand dollars to some so called professional but i got it done for free.

5. Good conversations. It's such a great feeling when you talk to some people and come out feeling refreshed. Our generation is filled with smart people.

6. Strength: I get asked; how do you combine your work, travelling, business, and the other side things you are working on? I honestly have no idea. I owe it to God for the divine strength. However, i need an assistant. It's time to get a PA and delegate :)

So darlings, what are you thankful for? Nothing is too small.....

Thursday, September 1, 2011

Fix you......

This week has been good in Blogosphere. On Monday, two writers whose views i respect a lot (and they follow me on twitter...woot woot!) dropped awesome posts that reminded me of my past.... Mr Spradley (aka Most) wrote on SBM on monday about emotionally unavailable men. It was epic, click on that link if you've not read it. I had to send it to some of my male friends to call their EUM asses out..... Then on wednesday, Max followed with her view.... another epic post. See why this week was amazing....

These two posts reminded me of my views on my post in my former blog in Dec 2008. (I have opened the blog so y'all can read it). I had just come out of a "situationship" (shout out to Kookie for that word) with an emotionally unavailable man and i had my Ha Ha moment.

In the last few years, i have realised that i am attracted to men that i clearly know won't lead in ex....
I know i am caring and i think i am pretty messed up in the sense that i tend to go for men that i feel like i can fix. I used to have this stupid notion that i can fix anyone and make him be what i want. It never worked and it will never work. Glad i am wiser now...

One thing that freaking pisses me off and Max also pointed out " if you really don’t want a woman to fall for you, don’t treat her like a princess. That doesn’t mean treat her like a servant, but treat her like a commoner. Good morning emails and good night text messages? Really? Why? So she can be under the impression that she’s the first thing you think of when you wake up and the last thing you think of when you go to sleep? All that’s doing is giving her an inflated sense of her importance in your life. And if she was all that important, you’d make her your girlfriend, wouldn’t you?"

If you don't want to take it further, stop being so fucking nice. You can create these boundaries and not send mixed signals but when you do shit like you are a boyfriend, then you know what, we fall for you men.....

Also Ladies, stop being too nice. I have been nice in the past, i'm still nice :) but i have done stupid things that if i mama heard, she'd have slapped the devil out of me....

Also, I am all for communication and letting your actions match your word, but my last ex, he did boyfriend shit, his actions meant boyfriend shit, but then his words turned around and said oh you know i said i was emotionally unavailable....all that B.S is for the birds....

Funny enough, Recently i met someone but his words were not matching his actions. Unlike the me before, i would have played Coldplay's Fix it and went in fully but i cut him off instantly, no more fixing anyone. No communication, no contact, nothing. I made him disappear. Go fix your ass before you come talk to me.

Even when we believe we can change people, it rarely happens. When a man says i am emotionally unavailable and so let's kick it, RUN! well except you are all for kicking it and no point in time will you want more. Heck i'm tired of reading subliminal tweets, facebook statuses and blogposts....when people tell or show you who they are, believe them.

If a lot of people could only listen, a lot of heartbreaks will be avoided.
I am done fixing people and the only time i want to play Coldplay's track is to gawk at the awesomeness that's called Chris Martin....other than that, if you need to be fixed, go check yourself into Rehab....