Wednesday, July 13, 2011

Day 9......... I don't wanna know

Source: The Journey.... Funms- The Rebirth (now closed)
Date: February 21, 2008
Title: Confessions
"Speaking of confessions.... how much do you reveal in your relationship. I hung out with my friend and her family last Christmas day in UK. We started conversing with her uncle and his friends and this issue came up. He said it is advisable for ladies to always let a guy know their entire past so nothing will come as a surprise in future. Quoting him, if u have always been a BT phone book and now you want to be a dedicated line, let him know. This is to avoid him realizing you have dated half of the area code....... I really don’t know how much you should say. People say what you don’t know won’t hurt you, so should you keep some things back? Personally, i always want to know everything that has happened before i came into the picture and vice versa. I don’t know if that is healthy......."

Today: 13th July, 2011


Over Three years ago, i wrote that excerpt. I was of the school of thought that i will really appreciate if i knew everything about my partner's past and vice versa.
Now i can say with a full conviction that i do not want to know. Oh wait a minute, i think i just got my first relationship conviction.

Anyway, i am more matured and i have learnt that it doesn't matter. I don't want to know how many women you dated before me, and all those revelations that come with it. If you want to know about mine, i will gladly tell you. If you volunteer yours, i will listen but i won't actually go out of my way to ask you.

I was at the gym this morning and while trying to draw up my last few energy on the stairmaster, John Legend's Number One came on.

For a minute, i was transported to the night he performed that song at the Rodeo and i remembered the gorgeous shirtless hunk he transformed to on stage....swoooon. Anyway, on that evil stairmaster, The part where he said
"Now who is she?
What's her name?
You don't need to know about everything"
struck me. I don't want to know. Now i am not saying if my man is cheating on me, i don't want to find out. What i don't want to know is the details or whatever happened.

Does this make me naive? Do you think i should be interested in knowing my partner's past and details before me? Am i more matured now or was i wiser back then?


  1. I have to agree, knowing your partners past (the details anyway) are never important. they muddle up everything and skew your opinion on what is/was otherwise a good relationship.

  2. I would want to know the important people from your past. like real girlfriends and such...runs, p's and all of that we can skip and vice-versa....

  3. Weird my bestie and I where talking about this song last night...or two nights ago...

  4. Change is the only constant thing...

    I thin id like to know about people that were important to him
    not every single past conquest, i agree with lohi,

    and i wont ask but i feel during the early stages of dating we would discuss our past, once and for all
    i have never been one to dwell on the past
    the brightness of the future makes it hard for me to bother about the past :)

  5. For the most part, I don't need specifics. However would like to know important details regarding past relationships. Even with regard to knowing you should only judge a person on who they are now, the past does represent who they are today. So if there are inadequacies or some issues that might be a problem in your relationship with this person, you can better understand where they are coming from, which would help you work through it with an open mind. Speaking of which, read another blog today, which is on the same line as revealing your past. In this case, 'Could you date a guy that used to be gay?"

    Is this something you would NEED to know?

  6. The past is never important in the grand scheme of things! except if it is a life changing or threatening fact


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