Sunday, July 10, 2011

Day 6........Weaknesses



Every human being has a weakness, whether acknowledged or not, and if left unrecognized can cause a lot more harm than intended. Every time i try to identify my weaknesses and address them into ways that may turn them into strengths. In the words of Ralph Waldo Emerson, “Our strength grows out of our weaknesses”

Like i said yesterday, it is okay to show emotions, in the same light, it is okay to admit your weak points. One of my weaknesses is "Assumptions" and this always leads to "Jumping into conclusions".

I think i'm the greatest "assumptionist" (i doubt that word exists) in the whole world. It probably stems from my impatience (another weakness that i have somehow managed to turned into strength) and this trait has caused more trouble for me than it did to the black community when black women decided to take sides of Team weave vs Team Natural.

My ex once said something to me casually; He told me that in his eyes, i would have been without flaws if not for my Always-jumping-to-conclusions-traits. I used to be so bad. If i call you and you don't pick, my mind will come up with at least 10 different WRONG conclusions as to why. I recognise this and admit that yes i am weak in this regard. However, my admitting it a while ago has helped me manage it better.

Lately i realise that when you assume, your expectations are not met and you end up getting hurt. My most hurt feelings came from situations in which i was impatient, made wrong assumptions and conclusions. The funny thing is i keep my conclusions to myself and i keep the hurt in.
For example
Me: Why didn't you read my bbms and not reply till hours later. I even sent you DM's on twitter and yet no response? (At this point i have concluded to myself that this person is ignoring them on purpose and i've gone into a really bad mood, contemplated deleting their pin and blocking on twitter)

Random Victim: Sorry, i was driving when i read your bbm and i could not reply, i tried calling but didn't get through and i have not been on twitter all day

See the scenario there, a true-life story by the way is one of many that my thinking has made me conclude wrongly and i end up getting hurt inside all for no reason.

I am changing and i have stopped jumping into fast conclusions, i am more patient, i wait issues out and think thoroughly without making decisions. I believe this is what they call growth and maturity. The impatient me is slowly becoming patient and i am a happier person for that.

Do you have any weaknesses or shortcomings that you have figured a way to address?

...Rebirth..a.k.a The only exercise i used to do before was JUMP into conclusion...

6 comments:

  1. Self-awareness is the first step :-)

    You aren't alone, there are many of us with our over-active imaginations on the road to recovery ;-)

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  2. Don't worry honey, its a female trait I think. The trick is to manage it and pretend that you are ok with it. The good thing is now you've told us we'll reply your messages quicker ;-)

    A weakness for me? eish I have too many I think to mention lol

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  3. I had to face my weaknesses head-on when my better half came on the scene. They always come out when you're hitched, and then you have to fix them, because it'll no longer be about just you. Somehow I feel that's what makes marriage so divine: we can overcome our inner weaknesses with the help of someone who loves us despite our flaws.

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  4. OMG i do this
    and then id delete the person sef, and then guilt sets it, and i have to lie my way out of explaining why i deleted them.
    i am working on patience now. and thinking before i act, that is my weakness

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  5. impatience has always been my greatest vice

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  6. That will be a whole new post!
    Off the top of my head, my deep ability to procrastinate will be first on the list!
    you don't want to know how much this has cost me in the past!*DEEP SIGH*

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